Category: Mental health

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Mothers Did Not Play With Their Children For 99% of Human History

Ask the Mountains

Why the absence of autonomous, multi-age playgroups makes parenting suck. (This is a reshare of Elena Bridgers’ article).

Sámi mommy breastfeeding toddler in Tromsdalen, Tromsø, Arctic Sápmi, while smoking some tobacco.

“Fasten your seatbelts, ladies and (two or three) gentlemen, because we are about to dive into the my absolute favorite topic of all time: the importance of multi-age playgroups in hunter-gatherer societies. Honestly, I get more excited about this stuff than a dog whose owner just said the word “walk.” Back when I first started reading about motherhood in hunter-gatherer societies there were two things that made me go, “ohhhhhhhh, now I get it.” One is the longer interbirth intervals that probably characterized most of human history (as I wrote about here) and the other is the critical important of multi-age playgroups as a source of substitute childcare for mothers. It was a total epiphany for me, and I suspect you may have the same reaction, because once you see how this used to work, how human childhood evolved to work, it just makes so much sense. Over millions of years, we basically evolved a perfect system involving care of children by children, in a way that was wholly compatible with their own need for play, and that we have entirely abandoned in the modern context, to the detriment of all.

But in order for you to understand why this still matters for mothers in the modern context, I need to tell you my own story about just how much I hate playing with my children (even though I love them deeply) and how misguided I was about the role of a “good mom” and what she owes her kids…

I’d rather stick a fork in my eyeball than play pirates.

Only after I had begun doing deep research on hunter-gatherer societies did I realize that this is exactly how things were supposed to work. Children are supposed to play with other children. It was never meant to be the mother’s job. But trapped as we are in single-family homes where playmates can be hard to come by, parents often end up filling this tedious and time-consuming role…[..]”

Read the full article here.

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How to Pray | Poem + video

Ask the Mountains

In a world that teaches
me first, me only, me always,
prayer is a quiet rebellion.
It begins with a bow,
a loosening of the fist
that clutches at control.

It dares to whisper:
I am not the center.
I am not the crown of all things.
I am a thread in the tapestry,
a note in the chorus,
a servant of something vast.
Something holy.

Prayer is an act of defiance
against the tyranny of ego,
against the hunger that never fills.
It topples the empire of the small self
and builds, stone by stone,
a sanctuary for all beings.

In prayer, we betray the myth of isolation.
We kneel not in defeat,
but in devotion and love.

Prayer is rebellion,
the most radical kind,
for it wages war not on others,
but on the walls within,
until only openness remains.

Through the power of prayer,
we can align ourselves with life and light itself. What a miracle.

We can call for the aid
of both ancient and recent Masters,
Beyond space and time.
Their luminous wisdom and boundless
compassion can touch our hearts as intimately as the Sun’s warmth opens flowers in the morning mist.

Prayer is not just mere words.
It is the trembling of the soul reaching for our wholeness, a candle lit in the dark, a river bending toward the ocean.
Prayer is tantra and transformation.

-M

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Trauma healing specials – try it now 🙏🏼

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Wanted to share this free online playlist on Youtube in six parts, focused on the healing of traumas in the psyche. It can be done sitting in a comfortable posture, or laying down if you prefer. It has been extremely helpful for me, so I share it in hopes someone else will benefit 🫶🏻

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Something old

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Bought a new diary, in hopes of finding time to write again; haven’t written anything in over a year. Initiated first page with this poem 😊🙏🏼💎

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Hjemmeundervisning?

Ask the Mountains
Noen gode åpenbare grunner jeg kom på til å kanskje velge hjemmeskole.

Alle foreldre vil jo det beste for sine barn. I det siste har vi tenkt mer og mer på å hjemmeundervise våre. Enn så lenge er de jo begge under 5 år, så vi har ennå litt tid på å ta avgjørelsen, men det er per nå hva som føles mest rett. Personlig kjenner jeg ennå på ettereffektene av 13 års skolegang (10 år grunnskole og 3 år videregående) og den skolevegringen som fargela alle de årene. Jeg er altså 33 år, men tenker fortsatt på det. Men ingenting er jo svart/hvitt; man kan for eksempel velge å hjemmeundervise de første årene, og så begynne på skolen ved et senere tidspunkt, for eksempel rundt tiårsalderen.

Er det noen av dere som leser dette innlegget som har noen erfaringer å dele på dette området?😊

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The Laws of The Sun

Ask the Mountains

Have to share this absolute gem of a film 🙏🏼 Found it very well made and entertaining to watch, and a good Dharma film to show kids. I don’t usually watch a lot of animé but I liked it!

Here is the sequel also; The Golden Laws

Happy new year. May all being be free!

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The shortest way

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“Maintain the state of undistractedness, and distractions will fly away. Dwell alone, and you shall find the Friend. Take the lowest place, and you shall reach the highest. Hasten slowly, and you shall soon arrive. Renounce all worldly goals, and you shall reach the highest Goal. If you follow this unfrequented path, you will find the shortest way.” -Milarepa

October photos. Colourful sky, sunny days and snowy days.. It’s always shifting very fast here, you could almost say there is four seasons within one season 🌅🌦❄️
Prayer flags in our garden ☃️ The weather was interesting that day; grey sky and sea, white landscape and a heavy kind of silence.
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To all the lonely Mothers out there

Ask the Mountains

Humans are herd animals, we’re mammals. We are literally made to raise children in the company and with the support of other women.

This is something we have lost as a modern society.

I would go as far as to say that we have a pandemic of lonely Mothers. Home alone most of the time with their babies, doing their best, often without much mental, emotional or physical support or stimuli from other mums. It’s not natural. And it’s not healthy for the baby; having their start in life defined by this kind of isolation.

It’s not long ago in our human history that women and mums were much closer, and could rely on each other more. I often wish I could turn back time, and experience that closeness, that kind of Motherhood.

In rare small (indigenous) communities around the world, this is still the case, and used to be like that here too (in Troms and Finnmark).

Loneliness sucks a lot of the joy out of Motherhood. It sits like a gray veil over us and makes us even more isolated. Not to mention the shame and guilt many mums feel for even feeling lonely, bacause we have our babies, so we should feel more than content.

But the truth is that women need women. Mums need mums. Only other mums can truly understand the ordeal of birthing and raising children.

So, if you feel lonely in Motherhood, like me, please do not blame yourself, the fault is not with you. It is that we as a modern society have separated ourself too much and we don’t see the importance and value of a supported mum. It’s kind of obvious though; a healthy happy mum = healthy happy start of life for baby, and thus for the all humans and society at large. It all starts with mum.

A painting I did some years ago. “I will keep you safe and warm”.
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Smartest guy alive

Ask the Mountains

Really enjoyed this 2 hour interview with “the smarteste man in the world”. Of course IQ isn’t everything, as he says himself, but I guess what I liked about this interview is how he early on in life decided to look for truth and meaning rather than using his brains to make money. They got into all sorts of topics, like beauty, reality, globalism, God, even aliens, cancel culture, etc. Very relevant atuff. Also, I found it funny how he said most buddhists nowadays don’t understand emptiness/sunyata, I think that is true.