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Mothers Did Not Play With Their Children For 99% of Human History

Why the absence of autonomous, multi-age playgroups makes parenting suck. (This is a reshare of Elena Bridgers’ article).

Sámi mommy breastfeeding toddler in Tromsdalen, Tromsø, Arctic Sápmi, while smoking some tobacco.

“Fasten your seatbelts, ladies and (two or three) gentlemen, because we are about to dive into the my absolute favorite topic of all time: the importance of multi-age playgroups in hunter-gatherer societies. Honestly, I get more excited about this stuff than a dog whose owner just said the word “walk.” Back when I first started reading about motherhood in hunter-gatherer societies there were two things that made me go, “ohhhhhhhh, now I get it.” One is the longer interbirth intervals that probably characterized most of human history (as I wrote about here) and the other is the critical important of multi-age playgroups as a source of substitute childcare for mothers. It was a total epiphany for me, and I suspect you may have the same reaction, because once you see how this used to work, how human childhood evolved to work, it just makes so much sense. Over millions of years, we basically evolved a perfect system involving care of children by children, in a way that was wholly compatible with their own need for play, and that we have entirely abandoned in the modern context, to the detriment of all.

But in order for you to understand why this still matters for mothers in the modern context, I need to tell you my own story about just how much I hate playing with my children (even though I love them deeply) and how misguided I was about the role of a “good mom” and what she owes her kids…

I’d rather stick a fork in my eyeball than play pirates.

Only after I had begun doing deep research on hunter-gatherer societies did I realize that this is exactly how things were supposed to work. Children are supposed to play with other children. It was never meant to be the mother’s job. But trapped as we are in single-family homes where playmates can be hard to come by, parents often end up filling this tedious and time-consuming role…[..]”

Read the full article here.